What genre book should I write next?

I write poetry, self help things, self improvement tips, motherhood stories and advice. I’ve tried my hand at fiction writing but I’m too scared to dive into it yet.

So far I’ve published 7 books: 2 poetry books, 2 self help books, 2 autobiography type things or maybe they’re called memoirs, and 1 self reflection workbook. I have a lot of ideas for new books, but since my books aren’t selling, I’m too scared to move forward with any of them.

I decided to do what I usually do when I’m lost and confused: take a quiz!

So here goes nothing…

Soooo… ๐Ÿ‘€ I got…

What type of book do you think I’ll write?

Comment below

Top 10 googled questions in 2020

I search a lot on google. When I research for my blogs, when I need advice, when I need memes or I have a question.

Google is very resourceful, but sometimes I feel like I google too much. That being said, I feel like a lot of people are just like me. And in this situation in Lebanon, I don’t have anything better to do than read, watch movies, and write blogs.

At 1st I was going to search most googled keywords on Google and pick the one that was related to mental health or motherhood and work on it, but I came up with top 10 questions googled during 2019 and 2020.

So I decided I will answer them to my knowledge without googling the answers.

1. When are the NBA playoffs?

I have no idea. I don’t watch any sports. I don’t even play sports. I used to swim and ride horses before I got married and became a mom. I used to play basketball during high school but I wasn’t very good at it. I do know who Micheal Jordon is and a few other names one of my brothers must have mentioned.

2. What is my IP adress?

I don’t know. I don’t even know what an IP adress is. Does it have to do with my laptop?

3. Where’s my refund?

I’ve never ordered anything online so…

4. What is love?

Now we’re talking! Love is a feeling of tenderness and care towards something or someone. Love is very broad but when I think of love, I think of family love, which is when family members do things for eachother without expecting anything in return. There is mutual respect and affection if it is between humans. You can love a cafe, a teddy bear, a dog, a person. To sum it up, love makes the world go round. Can you tell I’m a hopeless romantic? ๐Ÿ˜Š

5. How to draw?

Pick up a pen, pencil or anything with which you can draw, pull up a YouTube tutorial video or a step by step picture, and start working. Practice makes perfect.

6. Where am I?

Who would google this?! I don’t know where you are but I’m in the kitchen, hungry but with no appetite. If you’re lost, use Google maps, or ask around.

7. How many weeks in a year?

Let’s see if I’m still good at Maths.

1 year is 12 months, and each 2 months are 9 weeks, so 6ร—9=54

8. When are the early signs of pregnancy?

According to my knowledge, around 6 weeks of pregnancy, you begin to experience symptoms similar to pms but more severe. The morning sickness does not begin until the 3rd month, and it lasts all day so I don’t know why it’s called morning sickness.

9. Is mercury in retrograde?

I don’t know and I don’t care because I don’t believe in horoscope stuff.

10. Who called me?

Again, I don’t know why someone would google this, but check your call log.

What are your top 10 googled questions?

What’s your favorite thing about Earth?

I watched The Space Between Us today.

It was an amazing movie.

I’m inspired by everything I read and watch.

Almost everything.

I tried watching the movie The Little Mermaid but it was too Disney, too slow motion, too fake… I made it through 20 minutes before turning it off.

Yeah so the movie, I don’t want to spoil it for you, but it’s about a boy who is raised in Mars and upon visiting Earth asks everyone he meets:

“What’s your favorite thing about Earth?”

And I thought to myself, what a good question.

So what is my favorite thing about Earth ๐ŸŒŽ?

There are so many things.

Trees. Rain. Picnics. Flowers. Sitting in an airplane and looking from above the clouds to the view down below. I like movies and books.

I like how people are so sophisticated but deep down they’re just simple.

But my most favorite thing about Earth is how we only live on the surface of it. Deep inside the core of the Earth is molten lava, but on the surface there is beauty in every single detail. Waterfalls. Mountains. The sky. The sun. And all is on the surface.

Now what is my favorite thing about the people on Earth?

It’s their capacity to love. A normally shy person would break out of their shell for love. We take risks when we love. Everything is more beautiful when we are in love. I’m not just talking about romantic love, but also the love between parents and children, the love between friends, the love we have for our teachers and role models, and the love we have for God. That faith and hope that is born out of love is just magical.

So what is your favorite thing on Earth?

And what is your favorite thing about humans?

How to deal with circumstances out of your control

Happy Friday!

Not so happy, I know…

What with COVID-19 worsening, collapsing economy, and don’t get me started on the Beirut explosion and the aftermath of that!

There are 2 types of people in this situation. There are those who have initiative, who are getting donations moving and making things happen, and there are those who need a push, a tug, or a pull.

This blog is for the ones who feel helpless, like everything is out of their control. It’s not something to be ashamed of, but rather something to be aware of, and to work on overcoming.

Since I don’t have the answers, because I fall in this category sometimes, I did a little research. I will list a few ways to deal with this feeling of overwhelm, and at the end you will find the links to my sources, if you want to read the original articles, which I didn’t even read, by the way. I just copied the pinpoints.

Here are ways to deal with circumstances/situations out of your control:

  • Determine what you can control (Mindset, Work ethic, The way you treat others, Wellness, Language) and focus on that. Choose to wake up early, exercise, eat healthy, be positive. You always have a choice.
  • Identify your fears, challenge them, work to overcome them. Read and practice. Get help if you need it.
  • Concentrate on your influence. You do have an influence. Your words and actions matter to some people, so make sure you leave footprints wherever you go.
  • Differentiate between ruminating and problem-solving. Don’t sulk and sleep all day. Find a way to help. Do something. Share a post. Donate a dollar. Talk to a friend. No act of kindness goes to waste.
  • Create a stress management plan. When you feel your stress levels rising, focus on self care. Read a book. Watch a movie. Turn off the news. Sleep. Then when you feel better, get up and make a difference!
  • Develop healthy affirmations. These don’t work for everyone, but you can try applocations, sticky notes, printouts,… Whatever works for you.
  • Imagine what a role model or admired friend would do in the same situation. Having someone to look up to is really important.
  • Write down your thoughts. Writing can help you organize your thoughts, and release the negative ones. Whether you crumble the piece of paper after you write or if you keep it as a note on your phone, or post it, is up to you.
  • Talk to others about how you’re feeling. There is a certain power in being vulnerable. Opening up, sharing your perspective, gaining insight. You must choose a trusted friend, not just anyone.
  • The paradox of control. The more we try to control things the less control we will experience.
  • Accentuate the positive. Look on the bright side of every situation. Sometimes it’s hard to find, but keep looking.
  • Stay mindful and breath. Practice breathing exercises. Guided meditation helps.
  • Visualize your desired outcome. This helps in achieving your goals, but also in times of crisis.
  • Keep a sense of humor. Yes, memes help. Not always. Sometimes you need to cry and be sad and angry, but sometimes you need to let loose and not take life too seriously.

Takeaway message :

Rather than passively dealing with the situation, take initiative, and do it with confidence. Know that you have control over what you say and how you react. Take action. Rather than feeling victimized and helpless, do something.

Forbes, Here are six ways to stop stressing about the things you can’t control

Reachout, How to cope when things feel out of your control

Youhaveacalling: Free Yourself By โ€œLetting Goโ€ of What You Can’t Control

Medium: But there are some things in life that you can control.

Huffpost: How to take control of a situation

Fighting the urge to vent (a poem)

I can feel the bile rising in my throat
My stomach knotting, nauseous, I’m about to bloat
A burning rage inside me
I get the urge to vent
But I fight it, try to hide it
Because that is the reason for my discontent

How often have I vented to someone close to me
In a moment of anger or vulnerability
Only to have them twist my words
And turn around and spread the word
That my problem is 100 times more than I led on
That I need to let go rather than hold on

I look at them and all I see are lies and deceit
But I can’t confront the culprit
Because this conversation was discreet
And speaking up would give away another secret I must keep

Then I must pretend everything is ok
And tie my tongue when I’m asked about my day
Because who knows which words they’ll twist this time
Who knows what hidden meaning they’ll deduce in between the lines

I’ve learned to become distant with everyone
Until it all gets too much and I need to tell someone
So I go to my blog and write to my hearts content
Words are my solace, whether I read or I vent

Reading blogs helps me feel I’m not alone
Reading novels takes me to another home
Somewhere in my imagination
Where there are no lies
You don’t get stabbed in the back
While forcing a fake smile

I can go where I want to go
Be who I want to be
I can be brave, wise, quick on my feet
When I write poems or blogs, I feel like I can breathe
Like all the jumbled thoughts inside my head are finally free

And all my mixed up feelings somehow make sense
Even though my anger at the beginning of this poem was intense
Writing it down, though I didn’t specify
Who, what, where, when or why
I feel a little better having let it out
But I’m still holding my tongue back of the ones I care about

Because in a monent of anger or vulnerability
You may forget all the good things your loved ones do
So hold your tongue when you’re angry because if you don’t, you see
Your words will come back to haunt you when you least expect them to

Storytime: Regression to the mean

Hello ๐Ÿ‘‹

How are you doing today?

I don’t know if you’ve noticed from my posts, but I’ve been having many ups and downs lately. Lots of negative thoughts and feelings, too much drama, etc. Until today.

Today, I had a very productive morning, despite feeling lazy. Then at lunch time, I watched videos with my son of when he was 2 and when he was a newborn and it made me see how stern and disconnected I was with him, or at least on camera I was. Maybe I was tender off camera.

Anyway, it got me thinking “I really need to relax and be more mindful and loving towards him” and I did just that today.
It still took him 2 hours to eat lunch while watching PJ masks, but instead of pestering him about eating slowly or watching too much, I spent that time reading from this novel I started yesterday and which I’m halfway through already.

Then I suggested we organize his room. It took around an hour but we happily organized everything together and I realized he has done so much artwork and activities this year (I normally bug him about not doing enough activities, so I guess I didn’t realize he was already doing so much).
Then I suggested he color and he happily agreed.

Keep in mind I was showering him with praise and compliments since the beginning of lunchtime. No yelling. Just nice mother son bonding like in the movies. I even rewarded him with ice cream and a sticker on the fridge for being so good.

We even had a nice conversation.

Him: Mommy, do you have a baby in your tummy?
Me: No I do not.
Him: Why?
Me: Because God hasn’t put one yet.
Him: How do you know if there is a baby in your tummy or not?
Me: When I go to the doctor, she tells me.
Him: And you went to the doctor, and she told you there was no baby?
Me: Yes.
Him: When will there be a baby?
Me: Whenever I have a baby in my tummy, I’ll let you know, ok?
Him: ok

So after all this too good to be true day, where, may I add, he showered and then ate dinner without a fuss, came the grande finale.
I’m a believer of what they say in Teen Wolf: Regression to the mean.
It means that when things are too good or too bad, soon they will regress towards the mean, or the average.

So since I was having such a good day (mind you, negative things happened but I was unaffected), something bad was bound to happen, right?

After my son brushed his teeth and got ready for bed, he suddenly threw up all his dinner!

And there you have it, Regression to the mean!

He just fell asleep without a fuss, proving to me that he is an angel ๐Ÿ˜‡ but him throwing up kind of threw my mood off, because he doesn’t eat much as it is, and those who know me well know how much I struggle to feed him, so yeah it’s a big deal when he throws up or if he gets a fever (God forbid) because he loses weight immediately.

So there you have it.

Do you ever have a really good day and start fearing something bad will happen because you’re having a too good to be true day?

My days are usually filled with yelling and crying. I was yelling and crying today, between 12 and 2, but that’s only for 2 hours so… Progress!

Ok, I’m off to finish my novel and then sleep.

How is your wellbeing? IOW Are you ok?

Wellbeing. What does it mean?

the state of being comfortable, healthy, or happy.

Wellbeing constitutes a lot of things. It consists of family, financial, environmental, physical, social, spiritual and mental wellbeing.

So how is my wellbeing?

Let me see…

Since October 2019, the revolution began in Lebanon, then New Year came and we were all hoping 2020 would be the best year ever.

January and February. Worst winter ever. Lots of stormd. Maybe last winter was worse. I forgot.

March 2020, panic mode over COVID-19 and queue quarantine mode.

June came and with it hopes for a pleasant summer. Economy falling apart. Prices sky high in Lebanon. Tousists can come for cheap now, I guess.

Fast forward to August and here we are. COVID-19 โ˜‘ collapsing economy โ˜‘ scorching heat โ˜‘

How much worse can it get, right?


Beirut explosion yesterday โ˜‘

I’m just bein’ realistic, bein’ honest with myself
I’ve tried bein’ optimistic but it doesn’t seem to help
So I’ll just have to admit this is the hand that I’ve been dealt
I’m not bein’ pessimistic, just bein’ honest with myself
I’m not a cynic, oh, today’s just not my day
I’ve tried to spin it ’bout a thousand different ways
But from every angle, oh, the outlook is the same
I swear that I’m not a cynic, my glass just has no water in it today

– Alec Benjamin

So I decided to quiz my wellbeing. Applications are my thing. I downloaded Happy being a week ago and decided to start using it today. Before you get tricked like I was, you either subscribe and pay or get a 7 day trial for free. I’m doing the trial.

There are a few quizzes on it, and if you know me, you know I love quizzes, especially when I’ve been up since 6am with zero motivation to be productive. I mean I exercised and showered but my household is looking at me like ๐Ÿคฆโ€โ™‚๏ธ

My to do list for today
Feeling blessed to have my family around me but I may have been a bit withdrawn and toxic lately
Obviously with the economic situation. We’re better off than most people but I can’t help but fear how we will manage next year…
My environment is my home since I’m a SAHM
I haven’t been exercising properly, but I had been walking sometimes and doing light workouts at home occasionally
I know I need to go out more and see friends, but covid and everything expensive… And the heat. Maybe I’m making excuses, but j’a feel?
My faith and hope keep me going
I’m taking it day by day

How is your wellbeing?

Go to Happybeing and click Assess to assess your wellbeing. They also have journaling, meditation, and suggested activities to destress. We all need a bit of relaxation during these difficult times.

The key to happiness (a poem)

I’ve been walking on the same Path
For way too long
I often stop to take a breath
Then move along

It’s like I’m Constantly
In battle mode
Mind, heart and body
They sync too slow

My soul is full of adventure
My mind is full of regrets
My heart can’t handle the pressure
My body needs its rest

So I reassess my life
Quite often
I often close my eyes
Reflect Within

When you’re in a state of Flow
They say you feel your life perfectly align
I get that feeling to and fro
I’m mentally breaking down otherwise

They say the Key to happiness
Is to create it on your own
It’s to selflessly give
And to make your heart your home

Never get too attached
To things you may not always own
Never think you are the best
But have confidence to make it on your own

It’s the little acts of love
Towards yourself and others
That create our happiness

There’s always a part of us
That wants to be accepted by others
And how we act makes all the difference

5 facts about Eid Al Adha

Eid mubarak everyone!

I know it doesn’t feel like it, with corona virus and the economic crisis going on, but it’s Eid, and as Muslims, we only have 2 Eids, so let’s rejoice on this day. Let’s remember our blessings and pray for God’s forgiveness.

Let’s dress our best and go to Eid prayer, if the mosques are open in your area. Or pray at home if you c

Let’s wash our hands, put on our masks, and have a nice socially distanced Eid.

I wanted to share with you 5 facts about this Eid, to help you get a better understanding why this Eid is so important.

5 facts about Eid Al Adha:

1. Eid al-Adha commemorates when God appeared to Abraham — known as Ibrahim to Muslims — in a dream and asked him to sacrifice his son as an act of obedience. As Abraham was about to sacrifice his son, God stopped him and gave him a sheep to kill in place of his son.

2. Eid al-Adha (Arabic: ุนูŠุฏ ุงู„ุฃุถุญู‰โ€Ž ‘ฤชdu l-‘Aแธแธฅฤ) “Festival ” or “Greater Bairam” is a religious festival celebrated by Muslims all over the world, which falls on the 10th day of Dhul Hijjah, the 12th and last month of the Muslim lunar calendar. It is when Muslims sacrifice a goat, sheep, cow , camel,and bull sending part of the meat to poor people as a donation.

3. One-third of the meat is kept for immediate family members, one-third is given to friends and neighbors, and one-third is given to the poor. Part of the sacrifice of the animal is not only for personal consumption, but for helping the poor.

4. Unlike on Eid AlFitr, you should eat after the Eid prayer on Eid AlAdha. And if you‘ve offered a sacrifice, you can and should eat from your Qurbani meat. If you didn’t offer a sacrifice, it’s fine for you to eat before the prayer.

5. Working on the Eid day is NOT prohibited, but not performing the morning Eid prayer is not permitted, it’s Wajib means just next to Fard or mandatory. In Islam, this is encouraged to celebrate and exchange goodwill with people on Eid days. However, if you can’t and need to work, you can do so after the Eid prayer.

I hope you enjoyed these facts about this Eid, if you didn’t already know them.

Wishing all Muslims a Eid Mubarak, and wishing the world peace and prosperity and good health for all my friends and family.

I also wish to pray for, on this special day, all the oppressed and poor and sick people in the world.

I conclude this blog with the takbeerat of Eid:

ุงู„ู„ู‡ ุฃูƒุจุฑ ุงู„ู„ู‡ ุฃูƒุจุฑ ุงู„ู„ู‡ ุฃูƒุจุฑ , ู„ุง ุฅู„ู‡ ุฅู„ุง ุงู„ู„ู‡ , ุงู„ู„ู‡ ุฃูƒุจุฑ ุงู„ู„ู‡ ุฃูƒุจุฑ ูˆู„ู„ู‡ ุงู„ุญู…ุฏ ,ุงู„ู„ู‡ ุฃูƒุจุฑ ูƒุจูŠุฑุง , ูˆุงู„ุญู…ุฏ ู„ู„ู‡ ูƒุซูŠุฑุง , ูˆุณุจุญุงู† ุงู„ู„ู‡ ุจูƒุฑุฉ ูˆุฃุตูŠู„ุง , ู„ุง ุฅู„ู‡ ุฅู„ุง ุงู„ู„ู‡ ูˆุญุฏู‡ , ุตุฏู‚ ูˆุนุฏู‡ , ูˆู†ุตุฑ ุนุจุฏู‡ , ูˆุฃุนุฒ ุฌู†ุฏู‡ , ูˆู‡ุฒู… ุงู„ุฃุญุฒุงุจ ูˆุญุฏู‡ ,ู„ุง ุฅู„ู‡ ุฅู„ุง ุงู„ู„ู‡ , ูˆู„ุง ู†ุนุจุฏ ุฅู„ุง ุฅูŠุงู‡ , ู…ุฎู„ุตูŠู† ู„ู‡ ุงู„ุฏูŠู† ูˆู„ูˆ ูƒุฑู‡ ุงู„ูƒุงูุฑูˆู† , ุงู„ู„ู‡ู… ุตู„ ุนู„ู‰ ุณูŠุฏู†ุง ู…ุญู…ุฏ , ูˆุนู„ู‰ ุขู„ ุณูŠุฏู†ุง ู…ุญู…ุฏ , ูˆุนู„ู‰ ุฃุตุญุงุจ ุณูŠุฏู†ุง ู…ุญู…ุฏ , ูˆุนู„ู‰ ุฃู†ุตุงุฑ ุณูŠุฏู†ุง ู…ุญู…ุฏ , ูˆุนู„ู‰ ุฃุฒูˆุงุฌ ุณูŠุฏู†ุง ู…ุญู…ุฏ , ูˆุนู„ู‰ ุฐุฑูŠุฉ ุณูŠุฏู†ุง ู…ุญู…ุฏ ูˆุณู„ู… ุชุณู„ูŠู…ุง ูƒุซูŠุฑุง .

Translation of takbeerat:

1. Allah is Great
2.No one is God except Allah.
3. Allah is Great and Praise is due to Allah.
4. Allah is Great.
5.Many praise is due to Allah.
6. Praise to Allah at the beginning of the day and at the end of the day.
7.No one is God except Allah
8.He fulfilled His promise and gave Victory to His slave.
9.He strengthened His soldiers and He alone defeated the Ahzab.
10. No one is God except Allah.
11. We do not worship anyone but Him.
12. Our worship is dedicated only to Him.
13. Even if the non-believers hate it.
14. We ask Allah to raise the status of (our master) Muhammad,
15. And the Al (Muslim wives and relatives) of our (master) Muhammad,
16. And the sahabah (Companions) of (our master) Muhammad.
17. And the Ansar (The people of Madinah who supported the Prophet) of (our master) Muhammad,
18. And the wives of (our master) Muhammad,
19. And the descendents of (our master) Muhammad, and save the (Muslim) Nation of (our master) Muhammad

They can’t turn off the sun (a poem)

They’re trying to starve us
Making prices sky high
They’re cutting off our water
And electric lines

They’re making us beg for
Our basic rights
Keeping us busy
So we don’t fight

Try what they may
But I still have hope
They can try to make us leave
But somehow we’ll cope

Because they can’t turn off the sun
They can’t cut off the air
They can try to suffocate us
But they can’t break us
So don’t despair
God will always be there

They know we’re a force to be reckoned with
So they cut off our supplies and our oxygen
I don’t know how to solve this but I know this
We can pray to God to get us out of this

Somehow we’ll find a way out
Our voices won’t be silenced
If we help eachother out
And pray to God for guidance

Because they can’t turn off the sun
It will always rise and set again