Fitness Update

My goal is to exercise daily for 7 minutes or walk 6000 steps. So far, I haven’t achieved that goal. I made progress today, though.

I hit 10 minutes of fast-paced activity today!
I walked 2.73 km (4,418 steps).

On average, I’m exercising 4 days a week. Last week I exercised 6 days out of 7.

I’m at 63% of my exercise goal.

What are your fitness goals? Are you making progress?

What I’m working on

Hello and welcome to my blog! How are you doing today? It’s amazing how wordy I get once my creativity isn’t trapped in themes, but themes are important for the organization of my blog. Nobody wants to read incoherent thoughts and all over the place ideas.

Today I thought I’d share what I’ve been working on, not just in terms of writing, but in all of my goals. There are also things I want to work on but my plate is too full. I will tell you what I want to work on but can’t, to get it out of the way.

If you have been reading my blogs, you’ll know that the 1st 2 chapters of my kindle Vella are out, and I want to write at least 3 more chapters, but I’m working on so many other things. It’s frustrating because I already wrote the outline for the entire book, and I even reread the outline a few days ago and was immediately inspired to write chapter titles for the rest of the book. It’s the details I choke on. The details are what make a book. Focusing on the 5 senses to make your reader feel like they are in the book, perhaps even make them feel like the main character. Then there is the description of scenes and items and the sunrise and such. I need to clear my head to write this novella. It doesn’t help that I lack the confidence to write it. It took me 9 years of writing poetry to begin publishing my poetry books. And even now, I still feel cringe about my older poems. I have only recently begun publishing self-help books, but only because they were highly appreciated on the blog. Talking about myself has always been easy, so the autobiographies (though I had to censor most of them and strip them down from most of their content to protect my family’s privacy) were easy to write. But I’ve never written fiction before. This is hard, but it is something I must do, but it’s on the bottom of my priorities though I feel most passionate about it.

Now let me tell you what I have been working on to distract myself from the crisis in Lebanon and to control my anxiety and depression:

Healthwise, the goal is to take more walks, exercise daily, drink 1 L of water a day, go to sleep at 11 pm, eat fruits and veggies daily, shower 4 times a week, brush my hair 4 times a week, and brush my teeth daily.

So far I’ve reached my goal in showering and brushing my hair, so as you can tell, I have a lot of work to do.

As parenting goes, I’m trying to spend one on one time with my son, even if it is just for 5 minutes. I’m also supposed to be studying with him the rest of his kg3 curriculum before he heads on to the 1st grade.

We made a boredom jar 2 weeks ago, and we are doing various activities, from board games to play-doh to blindfolding him and having him feel and taste food and guess what it is. We even did word searches and “All about me” collages. Sadly, he wants me to do these activities with him, and lately, I’ve been exhausted and restless. My son isn’t driving me crazy, but I’m emotionally tapped out. As for studying, his going to camp and karate classes are making him tired and in the afternoon, my mental abilities are shot, so we only have Friday to study since Saturday and Sunday are family days.

Spiritually, I’m working on my prayers and reading Quran.

Financially, the goal is simply to stop spending all my money on junk food.

The prices have solved that for me. Prices are 10 times the prices they were a year ago.

Socially, as I have noticed myself being withdrawn, even from my family, I planned on texting 2 friends a day, calling a friend per week, calling my grandma once a week, and visiting my grandma once a month.

I’m trying, but I’m not there yet. I still feel like avoiding everyone while craving social connection.

My reading goals are simply to read blogs whenever I can and read from a book or pdf book daily.

I’m trying not to think of how many books I have to read but focus on one book at a time. It’s working. Yesterday I finished one of the books I was reading.

Finally, my writing goals can be divided into 2: working on my books (editing existing books to unpublish and republish, typing new books, promoting published books by creating canva designs and posting on Instagram and Twitter), and working on my blogs (writing blogs and creating canva designs for the cover photos).

So far so good.

Of course, I’m not even writing housework as part of my goals. I keep track of the housework I do on my calendar but I can’t add it to the list of 22 goals because that would be too overwhelming.

My ultimate goal is to create a balance between my mind, body, and soul. I want to thrive as a mother and as a writer while keeping myself happy and healthy. Happy people don’t shoot their husbands. They just don’t! (comment below if you have seen the movie legally blonde)

What are you currently working on?

Why I need to write things down

I write to-do lists to motivate myself to be productive. Otherwise, I give in to laziness and depression. I get anxious if I don’t write what I need to do because as a stay-at-home mom, I have a lot to do. Some people may think I just sit around and do nothing, and even though I do waste my time binge-watching sometimes, but I do get a lot done in a day. Maybe not as much compared to those housewives who cook and clean all day, but my productivity is about balance. For example, today I exercised and read Quran and prayed, and made sure my son studied. I did the dishes and laundry, watched 1 1/2 episodes of The Good Doctor, and did other little things, like making the beds and tidied up, and listened to my son, and assessed my goals for last week (something I usually do on Monday).

I write my goals to keep myself focused. Otherwise, I’ll just wander through the day passing the time. Besides being a mother and a housewife, I consider my writing my job. I take it very seriously, but I don’t force myself to do it. Yesterday I didn’t feel like writing, so I didn’t. I was in a mood all day because I hadn’t gotten any sleep the night before, and I was also trying to be productive while spending less time on my phone (I’m currently doing a productivity challenge on the 21 days challenges app).

I’m also doing a journaling challenge on the app because I need to self-reflect as well. I write to let things out, but I can’t write well if I don’t know what it is exactly what I need to let out. I called my mom yesterday. My relationship with my mom isn’t one I write about on the blog, but it is a bit complex. I love my mom. I do, but I’m still working on accepting her as she is and not expecting her to be like other moms, all while trying not to be like her while finding out I’m more like her than I care to admit. As I said, it’s complicated. Watching tv shows helps me self-reflect because I observe social interactions between the characters.

I write blogs to let my thoughts and feelings out. I’ve learned the hard way that nobody cares. Rarely anyone ever wants to know how my day went, except for my older sister sometimes. I share big stories that happened during the week with my family on Saturday, like when the glass fell on my arm and bruised it a week ago, and they make good stories. I’m good at telling a story with my family, as long as it doesn’t involve deep conversation. I find strangers are more invested in how I feel than my family, and can relate more.

I write my goals and tasks so that I don’t forget.

Grammarly doesn’t catch all mistakes, so I still had to reread the posts and edit more than 40 mistakes per post.

I write about my thoughts and feelings so I don’t ruminate over them. The blog is like a brain dump for me sometimes. If you ask me to reference my blogs, I honestly can’t remember. I edited a few blogs from 2017 a few days ago, because back then I used to write one paragraph and I made many grammatical mistakes.

These are the blogs I edited from 2017

I started this post aiming to write my progress with my goals, but I guess I’ll just take a picture of my assessment instead, like I did last week.

Physical goals increased 19% compared to last week, while emotional control decreased 14% compared to last week.

I keep obsessing over my stats. On the one hand, I noticed most people aren’t getting past my home page lately, which to me is bad. On the other hand, I have more views in these 6 months of 2021 than I had in all of 2020. Just a tiny bit more but still, it feels good.

5,725 views in the last 6 months compared to 5,711 views last year.

Also, I’m starving. I had a bowl of coco pops at 9 am and it’s after 1 pm. I also really need social connection but I also don’t feel like talking to anyone. Don’t get me wrong. I’m happy today. However, my son is starting to get bored, and he has been mouthy with me lately, but I don’t want to expose him on the blog. I’m hoping I’m able to deal with him with wisdom. For the time being, I’m practicing patience.

In conclusion, writing for me is a need and a want. I appreciate every one of you who takes the time to read my blogs, like, comment, and/or share. I don’t get paid to do this but I find a sense of belonging here more than I do with my friends and family. So thank you for being here with me on my rollercoaster journey, as I try to understand myself and as I reach out to you and try to give advice. I tear myself apart and bare my soul to you so you can understand yourselves better and hopefully help me understand myself better.

I write here because I need someone to write to, and in my life, I don’t have someone who will listen. Everyone is either busy or simply doesn’t care. I do have people who occasionally listen. I don’t want to sound ungrateful for the loved ones in my life, but they don’t read my blogs, so I very much appreciate that you do.

Thank you my readers from the US, India, UK, South Africa, Canada, and Lebanon.
Thank you my fellow bloggers who read the most. Thank you to those who read from Pinterest, Facebook, and Instagram, no matter how few you are.

When I 1st started my blogging journey, I never imagined I’d get here, and yet here I am, with so far more to go. I just wanted to stop and acknowledge the progress I’ve made as a writer and to thank you my readers because I couldn’t have don’t it without you. With all the reasons in which I write, you are one of them. I write for myself, but I also write for you.

I’m off to eat lunch and then draw superheroes for my son because that was the deal. He studies and I draw things for him.

He has me draw the ones that are too hard for him to draw. I drew the 1st row. He drew the 2nd row.
He drew his dad as a superhero as well.